Tag Archives: klingon

C’mon feel the…..

6 May

…wrath of my hairdresser

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Yep,that’s me on the far right.

I trust my hairdresser. And I love the fact I go to her house with a wet mop of hair, and leave in half an hour with exactly what I asked for. And it costs me 15 quid. However, over the years I have realised that we should not get into heated discussions as we both get very animated, distracted and I end up with less hair than I bargained for. This time the discussion was about the great North   South divide and the injustice.

The Beardy Man has been singing Slade songs, and I have been surprised at how many he knows, especially as he is a metal head.He has also been informing me that I will now be accepted for the Star Trek Vulcan Academy, despite failing my Klingon “A” level.

However, my hair grows quickly and going to a salon is out of the question as I hate being ripped off. And to be honest if you are a woman with hair and want it cut you get charged more than a man.

For example, the Beardy Man just got his hair cut today. He got a cut and blow dry. It cost him 12 quid!  It costs me 35 quid. I usually get the speech that I have long hair blah blah blah. But what they don’t take into account I just get the ends trimmed and my fringe cut! AND I’m not into all this product and straightening lark, or the styling blow-dry. My face often looks smacked and sunburned due to the inferno heat from the turbo charged supersonic hairdryer.  And I get to witness it all in front of a giant mirror next to the window that looks onto a busy street and is situated directly next to traffic lights.So now I just get on with it at home and save a fortune and my dignity.

So here goes for the low down on savings:

Hair Dye- Boots Botanics- £4.99 per box and sometimes 3 for 2. Roots touched up every fortnight (it’s a curse)

Hairdressing scissors-Boots – £10. Beardy Man cuts my fringe(extra bonus when he takes on the personality of a really grumpy hairdresser!)

Visit to my hairdresser every 3 months £15.00.

Just check out these price lists!

Rita Rusk      Monkey Business (I do like their website)    eurohair and beauty and the last 2 are at the cheaper end.

In some salons the price varies depending on the stylist attending to your head! I always pitch for the new start which is why I have had the hair bear bunch experience.

Ok it was the 80’s and spiral perms were in.

This isn’t me BTW but the perm is similar, only that I have a bald patch where my “widow’s peak” should be.

Once upon a time I had a “Louise Brookes” bob. I loved it.

The only problem was that due to my low neck line at the back I needed my neck shaved every 2 weeks. My pal called it “gorilla neck syndrome”.

Big Jack (my grandpa aka “Pop”) told me to go to “Shaky Jakes” the barber that he frequented for his “short back and sides”. I introduced myself and told him pop had sent me. But he wouldn’t shave my neck because I was female. Anyway he was shaking too much that I thought it best to leave well alone. So I let my pal Graham shave my neck every 2 weeks, with a bic razor.

I think most of my family suffer from commaphobia (ok so I made that up, I stuck some latin onto phobia) my big cuz Queen Marie is the same, and my brother has taken to the 2012 version of the comb-over and shaves his head with a blunt butter knife.

Anyway, it’s all about building up trust, and that’s what we all need to do with our hairdresser. They can make you look beautiful for a day, or you can be ugly for a whole 2 weeks. That’s the difference between a good and bad hair cut.

Well I’m off to find a winged gold jumpsuit and guitar. If I’m gonna be a whole load of ugly I may as well make some money out of it….